The Lobster Heist: An Unlikely Hero
A short story by Dennis featuring Roberta
It was a cold winter night, and Dennis had a special surprise in mind for Roberta’s birthday.
Bundled in their warmest clothes, they stepped into the cozy lobster restaurant Dennis had chosen. The flicker of candles and the soft murmur of diners gave the place a serene, intimate feeling.
Roberta smiled, her eyes lighting up as she realized the effort Dennis had gone to.
The lobster dinner was just the start of what he hoped would be a perfect evening.
The dinner began without a hitch, with Roberta teasing Dennis about the surprise and him quietly enjoying her happiness.
As they settled in, the mood was light — until everything suddenly shifted.
The doors burst open, and in walked a group of masked individuals, their presence sending a ripple of panic through the room.
The leader — a tall, jittery man — shouted:
“Everyone stay calm! This will be over soon!”
Roberta instinctively gripped Dennis’ hand under the table, her heart racing.
A woman from a nearby table shielded her child, but one of the masked men yanked the child into the center of the room.
“Nobody moves, or the kid gets it!”
The entire restaurant fell into silence.
Dennis felt his stomach twist.
His mind raced back to a memory he had long buried — something eerily similar had happened to him in a Home Depot years ago. The image of that terrified child brought it all rushing back.
“Stay low and still,” he whispered to Roberta.
“We’ll get through this.”
He noticed the criminals were disorganized. Nervous. Their inexperience might be the only advantage he had.
Then — he spotted it.
One of the masked men stood near the main circuit breaker. His background as an IT engineer and handyman kicked in.
If he could reach that box…
Maybe he could shift the odds.
Using the dim lighting to his advantage, Dennis slid behind the bar, out of view.
He reached the breaker and waited — one breath, two — then flipped the switch.
Total darkness.
The room erupted in confusion.
Dennis knocked over a tray for added chaos and darted toward the captor holding the child.
With a move he hadn’t practiced since his boxing days, Dennis tackled and disarmed the man — grabbing the child in one fluid motion.
Sirens howled in the distance.
The masked men panicked and bolted.
Dennis calmly returned the child to their sobbing mother just as the lights flickered back on and the police swept in.
Amid the commotion, Dennis took his seat again beside Roberta.
“I think our lobster’s getting cold,” he said with a wink.
Roberta, catching her breath, burst out laughing.
“You’re my hero, you know that?”
Dennis smiled.
“Just another night out, right?”
The End
Disclaimer from the Department of Dumbassery
These stories are 100% fiction, written by Dennis for the sheer joy of storytelling, caffeine-fueled inspiration, and occasional dramatic flair.
Do not attempt to reboot haunted Roombas, operate ancient puzzle boxes without supervision, or bring honey near celestial machinery.
Any resemblance to real people, pets, or smart appliances is purely coincidental… unless it’s funny.
Thanks for reading — now go solve a mystery, drink your coffee, and be a little legendary.